Balls of...?

Everyone's heard the tragic tale of the man from Madras and his severe medical complications. For those of you unfamiliar with the case, I'll quote the famous limerick based on his struggles, which is believed to have originated from a scholarly medical text of the early 1900s. Of course, I heard it from one of the Leprochaun movies, I think. Maybe a drunk frat boy. Regardless, it's still a timely warning for those amongst us who suffer the same cruel fate.

There once was a man from Madras
Whose balls were made of brass
And in stormy weather
They'd clang together
And sparks would fly out of his ass.

But what about other ball compositions? Surely brass isn't the only way to go. Some 75% of the periodic table is comprised of metals!

So my friend, The Flavinator, and I were talking. I don't know if it has been attempted before. I don't know if it's possible. But, god as my witness, I have taken it upon myself, with his help, to write a limerick for every metal in the periodic table. This blog is dedicated to that task.